As I prepared to leave for a recent speaking engagement, I realized how tired I was, how desperate I was for my own experience of intimacy with God, and how much I needed the very things I would be guiding others into on that day. After 25 years of life in ministry, I had learned to pay attention to such inner dynamics and knew better than to wait for a better time. I packed a simple bag, made overnight arrangements as I drove to the retreat I was leading, and left right from the speaking engagement to enter into 24 hours of silent retreat. That choice alone changed the tenor of the whole week and the whole month that followed.

One of the most important rhythms of my life as a person in ministry is a constant back and forth motion between times when I am engaged in the battle, giving my best energy to taking the next hill and times of retreat when I am not "on" and I do not have to be any particular way for anyone. Times when I can be in God's presence for my own soul's sake.

A sobering ...