The social innovation called gay marriage requires the church to pay attention to its theology of marriage in a way that it hasn't done in a long time. Western thought about marriage was shaped by the Protestant and Catholic Reformations, and those basic conclusions served both church and society (with adjustments) until the 1960s. The 19th-century ferment, which aimed to protect and empower women by giving them the freedom to vote and hold property, left basic understandings of marriage intact.
In the 1960s, society finally shed the remnants of Christian notions of marriage, reducing it to a contract between individuals for the pursuit of intimacy. Certainly, one major factor in that change was the advent of the pill, which ultimately resulted in the divorce of sexual intimacy in marriage from procreation. Now that this separation has made gay marriage thinkable, Protestant thinkers are relearning the biblical necessity of connecting marriage with children.
Pastors cannot wait for the theological conversation to run its course before they face issues of pastoral care of gay people in our congregations. Some members of theologically conservative churches do experience same-sex attraction, and in many congregations, people have tacitly formed long-term same-sex pairings. The advent of gay marriage as a social issue means such couples are now talking more openly to their pastors about it. Those pastors have to provide teaching, guidance, understanding, compassion, and prayers.
We are pleased that the Summer 2004 issue of our sister publication Leadership picks the brains of four pastors who minister in gay-friendly urban areas. The article ("Same-Sex Marriage: What Can I Say?") is posted online at Leadership Journal.
None of these pastors wants to make issues relating to homosexuality the major mark of their ministry. As Phil Busbee, pastor of the First Baptist Church of San Francisco, says, "As a pastor, I don't want to be known for my stand on 'the issue.' I want to help a person meet Jesus and grow into mature faith."
A pastor's first calling is the cure of souls, and having that priority straight is extremely important in opening the channels for personal ministry. And what the whole congregation communicates about who is welcome in their midst is also a key to ministry. As Cheryl Sanders, pastor of Washington, D.C.'s Third Street Church of God, says, "There has to be an openness that says 'whosever will, let them come.' "
But that doesn't mean any of these pastors wants to duck gay issues either. They are firm about the biblical vision for human sexuality. And they are also advocates for the fair treatment of gay people in society.
These pastors teach a one-man, one-woman model of marriage. But that doesn't mean denying marriage just to homosexuals. It also means denying
marriage (as most pastors have done) to heterosexuals who aren't ready, well matched, or prepared to make a full commitment to God's ideal for marriage.
We pray that the articles in this issue will help you think clearly about the meaning of marriage, and we hope that the conversation in Leadership helps pastors and congregations in their ministry.
Next Issue: Bush, Kerry, and Election 2004; a harrowing escape from North Korea; and tuning in to Christian TV.