Skills

How to Minister to People Who Don’t Like You

Eight tips to love the hard-to-love.
How to Minister to People Who Don’t Like You
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I have always been committed to obey the call of God no matter what. I was committed when I was ordained and released to plant a church in a community that didn’t approve of women in ministry. I was committed when someone actually threatened my life if I followed through with the church plant. I was committed when Johnnie—my husband, my greatest supporter, and ...

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Five Ways to Respond to Mansplaining

You’ve been invited to the table for a reason, and your team needs to hear what you have to say.
Five Ways to Respond to Mansplaining
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You got invited to an important ministry team. You come prepared to your first meeting eager to engage and share your ideas. You’re thankful for a seat at the table and excited for the opportunity to serve. Despite your excitement and hope leading up to the meeting, however, you leave the meeting completely second-guessing yourself, wondering why you were even there. ...

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The Vulnerable Act of Public Speaking

Find your voice—and keep it.
The Vulnerable Act of Public Speaking
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Voice is more than simply speaking; it engages the whole self—mind, body, spirit, your true self. Using another category, such as this one, helps us access elements of identity and authenticity in a different way and can become another set of practical strategies for going about living into your own sense of truth. How we understand voice can be lodged in four categories: ...

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How to Get People to Respect Your Leadership

Start by making a believer of yourself.
How to Get People to Respect Your Leadership
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You go home and flop on the couch, feeling the tension that has built in your body. Another day of frustration and indignity, fighting to be heard and recognized, all while wondering why you have to work so hard to be taken seriously.

Do you wish others would accept you and respect you in your leadership role? Do you frequently feel dismissed, ignored, or overlooked? How many ...

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The Power of Questions

The one leadership tool you’re probably forgetting.
The Power of Questions
Image: Ford Asia Pacific/Flickr

Most influential leaders will tell you that reading, thinking, and making sound decisions are critical elements of leadership. What they might fail to mention is these exchanges are informed by how well we listen, who we listen to, and how we interact with ideas. Leadership hinges on the ability to ask good questions.

Jesus was the master of well-placed questions. “Who ...

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How to Lead Dominating Male Leaders

Three things I’ve learned as I’ve led dominant men
How to Lead Dominating Male Leaders
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It’s a good thing I didn’t know all of the challenges I would face when I first became a lead pastor. If I had, I may have done a “Jonah” and ran in the opposite direction. I had no idea how many different hats I would need to wear or how many diverse personality types I would have to learn to relate to.

As a recovering people pleaser, one of the most ...

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Is Having It All Worth Having?

Three practices that help me focus on what matters.
Is Having It All Worth Having?
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The woman who has it all always look flawless. She’s an immaculate homemaker, devoted mother, stylish decorator, exciting wife, gourmet chef, thoughtful friend, and successful worker. Before you get down on yourself for not measuring up, though, realize that the woman who has it all is a mythical creature as rare as a unicorn.

Whether it’s having it all, doing it ...

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My Friendship with Elisabeth Elliot

Leadership lessons over decadent desserts changed my life.
My Friendship with Elisabeth Elliot
Image: Used with permission from Lars Gren

“The fact that I am a woman does not make me a different kind of Christian, but the fact that I am a Christian makes me a different kind of woman.” —Elisabeth Elliot

On June 15, 2015, Elisabeth Elliot, one of the most influential Christian women of the 20th century, passed away. On that day, The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, and The Washington Post ...

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You’re Not Always Right

We all have biases that affect the way we interpret the Bible.
You’re Not Always Right
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There are Christians who have very strong opinions on just about everything: how to vote, how to raise children, how to date, how to stay married, and how to interpret Scripture. Often, Christians back up their opinions with Scripture. But how many of those subjects are truly addressed in the Bible? We might be surprised to find that some of the values we hold most dearly ...

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Four Steps to Form a Personal Support Group

As you minister to others, don't neglect your own need for challenge and encouragement.
Four Steps to Form a Personal Support Group
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When my husband and I planted a church, our entire focus was on what we could do for others. We wanted to win people to Christ, disciple them, and send them out to do the same. We became single-minded, and we worked harder than I ever thought possible.

This was all good, but somewhere along the line, I lost perspective on what I needed. I was so consumed in what others ...

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