The Global Conversation

This article is EXACTLY what I needed to read today. It has given me much hope and has alleviated the self-imposed guilt of not having things turn out exactly the way I had planned. Yes, I've made mistakes as a parent, but I have done the best I could and have strived to be what my kids needed me to be. Thankfully, God is bigger than our parenting skills, our weaknesses, our flawed personalities, and our kids' choices. God is at work even if it might not look like it to us.

I would not be so quick to relieve the guilt of parents who are guilty of poor parenting. For some reason parents think they own their kids and order them about. Kid's are God's gifts to us for awhile but they remain His. I can't tell you how many times I have offered the Parenting with Love and Logic books and DVD's to parents and they refuse. They refuse to take the time to improve their parenting skills. Too much trouble. The kid is impacting their lives. A persons normal tendency to self-centernedness is very strong. Parents refuse to let the child have their own lives or treat them with the respect that accords. No, there are no perfect parents, but if we give the kids an admirable person to follow and let them make the choice, they will follow. Be admirable before your kids. Do not order them to have certain faith or behavior. Let them see the value of your faith. Visit my blog for more: http://freesundayschoollessonplans.blogspot.com/2009/09/survey-says.html

Amen and amen! There is no formula parents can adhere to that guarantees the subsequent godliness of their children. In a fallen world all that is done is done imperfectly; even by well-meaning, committed believers.

As a Family Therapist and Minister I agree with the tone and intent of the article. May I add a couple of Points.: 1. Fallen Nature means that no family, no child and no parent is perfect. 2. Even if the parents were perfect, the kids would not be. 3. I teach parenting skills to help the parents and kids avoid as much pain as possible. 4. I do think the patterns in a family affect the behavior of chilsren in many cases. 5. The key is ora et labora. Prayer and Work but neither promise perfection.

Actually, I meant to hit 5 stars. The middle ground is the same with child-rearing as it is with everything else in life: the parent knows the child and raises the child the best they can (i.e., biblically) to the extent they can and leave the results to God. That's it. Everyone has their own story, of course, but I've seen plenty of kids turned away from the faith by pushy parents who cram everything spiritual down their child's throat. My children follow God, but I know for sure it's not because of anything I did.

How to raise loving children in an age of self aggrandizement? Definitely a difficult task.

Mixed feelings. On the one hand, it is certainly true that parenting cannot be guaranteed; some children will end up in the ditch despite everything the parents do. On the other hand, I can cite actual examples where certifiably stupid parenting (e.g. of the youngest child) has produced one monster in an otherwise well-behaved family. This article is almost an excuse to let oneself off the hook no matter what. Where's the middle ground?