The Global Conversation

This article was given to me from a Bible study friend. When prayer requests are asked, everyone one of us has concerns about our children and our parenting skills. This is formost on most Christian parents minds. Oh how we judge others and beat ourselves up. This article gave me Scripture based hope and peace. It also encouraged me to parent with perserverance and love. It was a balm to my hurting soul. Thank you so much for extending some relief to those of us who parent the strong willed, non-compliant child. At last I feel understanding, compassion and answers for my difficult parenting struggles. God bless you...and God bless my son!

Thank you so much for an empowering and uplifting article. God knew I needed to read this as I struggle with raising two toddlers and a being a pastor's wife to boot. My kids are a challenge and are defintely far from compliant. My prayer is that the Lord will guide me as I "train" them "the way they should go."

Thanks for an article that examines the intersection of Christian living and current scientific research. It's welcome and long overdue. I have friends who obsess over their roles as parents. Some think that if they jump on the homeschool bandwagon, for instance, or force their children to memorize verses, they will somehow protect their children's "souls" from the evils of the world and produce perfect kids. My husband was raised in a fundamentalist Christian home, and today his sister is an ardent fundamentalist -- and my husband became an atheist. Go figure. Today we're learning how much of our personalities -- even the intensity of our spiritual lives -- is connected with our brain structure and our genes. Let's remember our own limitations as parents -- and remember that God is ultimately in charge of caring for our souls.

Amen. I'm now able to say we are half way done raising our 5 daughters & 1 son. This is the truth we have seen. Raising children is the most precious job anyone can have here on earth. Also the strangest. Please read her words carefully. "Love,risk,perseverance and faith." That is what she said! In ALL human endeavors this is the utmost we can do,ever. Quite difficult, yet simple. Simple as God's grace.

See Ted, this is what I mean. You are splitting theological hairs and failing to see the forest for the trees. Main Point: God, as our father (okay, technically our creator) became upset with his rebellious children (okay, technically his creation), and what was his first, best response that he pulled from his parenting toolbox? Drown them all. Again, please think about that. Other responses?..kill children that disrespect a parent.....rip to pieces a group of children that teases his prophet.....give a fatal disease to a new born baby because the parents (David and Bathsheba) sinned. Without theological excuses, how can these actions be defended as proper ways to deal with children? If someone walked up to you on the street and said this is how to raise kids, you would think he was insane. And is god not the same yesterday, today and forever?

One thing Christian parents can and should do, OFTEN - is PRAY for your children. It may well be the most effective thing you can do. The fact that our best and most spiritually pursued parenting efforts are no guarantee of how our children will turn out, makes me ponder more and more the incredible mystery of free will. Why one child will become a Christian and its sibling will forever remain in unbelief, despite the most Christ-like efforts and motivations of the parents, is something very difficult to understand. Yet, certainly, I realize that God must (first) draw them, that ALL have the ABILITY (but not necessarily the desire) to obey the command to repent, and that God draws those He already foreknows will accept and follow his freely given, and totally unearned, gift of salvation. Free will is like the Trinity, we know it's Scriptural, but no one can adequately explain either. There is much about the Bible's teachings in which we must simply accept on faith.

Atheist: God never called everybody his 'children', but image-bearers. Bearing his image is having free will to choose for him or against him. We naturally choose against him, but he lay down his own life for us. Know the Book before you argue from it. He loves you. Ms Fields: what's this? 'We are responsible to impress his laws on [our children]…' Where's salvation by grace through faith? I like the article on the whole; but part of our problem might be the fact that we assume the little children that Jesus used as models for his Kingdom are unready for grace and must be smacked down and slammed around by the Law before they are ready for the Gospel. GOSPEL churches do this… 1st Corinthians 15:56 'The sting of death is sin; and the strength of sin is the LAW.' Even Martin Luther, who rediscovered the Gospel, insisted little children be taught the Law, the 1o Commandments. The Law ended with Jesus' triumphant 'It is finished!'

Let me get this straight. You all are taking parenting advice from a diety who, when faced with his own rebellious children, drowned them all. Would you please think about that? And to make things worse, because he is omniscient, he knew....he knew. . .that in a few generations, they would be just as rebellious as they ever were...and he drowned all his children anyway. Perhaps a more reasonable source of parenting techniques should be sought out?

Well-meaning friends and not-so-well-meaning authority figures often give parents conflicting advice. Some tout the Love and Logic approach while others see it as Adlerian psychology cloaked in Christianese. Some preach structured parenting while others insist on attachment-based strategies. So many parents whose kids happened to turn out well seem to be self-appointed experts, no matter what method they used (God is merciful). Many frustrated parents are neither unteachable nor particularly self-centered, they're just confused. The subtle message they hear is, "If your kids aren't perfect, it's the fault of your parenting." Certainly we all have things to learn about parenting. However, my observation as an evangelical pastor is that parents of wayward children are often judged before the conversation even starts. Parents need the support of a healthy community, not just information. Unfortunately it's easier to hand people books and tapes than to get involved in their lives.

Exactly the kind of article that once again leaves you wondering...is there any answer? It is a key issue that drives many parents to question the validity of their faith. There are promises after promises in scripture, yet there are "wayward" children from virtually every union...how is this? We know we are sinful beings, but have been promised, with all our weaknesses, to get what we ask for. What Christian parent does not want their offspring to follow Christ? The upshot of this article appears to be..."Do what you can ...leave it to God...but there are no guarantees;" not too comforting!