Many of us have people in our lives who have hurt us. They have violated us in big and small ways to the point at which it feels impossible to let go of the inevitable feelings of resentment, anger, and the desire for revenge. These feelings are natural, but they can also have hurtful consequences on our lives that we do not intend.
One of my hobbies is creating my own greeting cards. I glue one of my little paintings to cardstock and personalize the card. But the simple task of gluing these together can be tricky. On innumerable occasions, the glue has gotten onto me; I stick to the wrong things, and the wrong things stick to me.
In the same way, we can get stuck to the wrong people who prevent us from moving on. Our negative emotions function like glue and affix us together with them. Close proximity gives them power over us. Often these people know exactly which triggers will set us off and lead us to react in uncontrolled, dysfunctional ways.
In 2 Corinthians 5:17–19 we find a promise of newness. In Christ’s recreation, we can wash the dysfunctional old glue off. We can, through Christ, don his power and become new.
We can’t change another person or force them into repentance. We can’t heal them. We can’t outsmart them. We can’t protect ourselves from them. But we can stop playing the games, detach ourselves from their dysfunction, and grow into something totally new. We can take back control—and, through God’s power, somehow learn to love them.
Wilma Derksen is the author of The Way of Letting Go: One Woman’s Walk Toward Forgiveness. You can find her at WilmaDerksen.com or follow her on Facebook.
