After living with quadriplegia for a short time, I finally got tired of being fed at our dinner table. But as I tried to feed myself with paralyzed arms, I felt like giving up. I wanted my arms back! Wasn’t there an easier way than having a bent spoon inserted into the pocket on my leather arm splint, then straining my weak shoulder muscles to scoop food on the spoon, and finally balancing and lifting it to my mouth? It was humiliating to have my food land more times on my lap than in my mouth.
I could have surrendered—it would have been easy, and many wouldn’t have blamed me. But I had to make a choice—was I going to let disappointing failures overwhelm me? I decided that fighting through the awkwardness of feeding myself outweighed the fleeting satisfaction of self-pity. It pushed me to pray, O God, help me with this spoon! Today I can easily feed myself. No, I didn’t recover the use of my hands, but I was able to leave self-pity behind, as well as cultivate a little bit of humility. It meant making the hard choice many, many times.
My growth in Christ can probably be boiled down to one word: choose. Choosing the right path is hard. Often we have to keep pushing through failures. Sometimes it seems easier just to ignore God’s instructions. But Proverbs 8:10 says, “Choose my instruction rather than silver, and knowledge rather than pure gold.”
Joni Eareckson Tada is founder and CEO of Joni and Friends International Disability Center, a bestselling author, and a CT Women advisor. She served as general editor of the Beyond Suffering Bible (Tyndale) from which this content is adapted. Used with permission by the author, Joni Eareckson Tada. Bible features © 2016 Joni and Friends. All rights reserved. TYNDALE, New Living Translation, and the New Living Translation logo are registered trademarks of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc. Beyond Suffering is a registered trademark of Joni and Friends, Inc.