Responding to Learning Disabilities

I was standing at the front of the congregation giving an altar call when I saw our eight-year-old learning-disabled son dart away from his mother and come running down the aisle toward me. He had done this before. When he got to where I was standing, I took him firmly by the shoulder and sat him down on the front row.

Immediately a voice within me seemed to say, You have offended one of my little ones. I remembered that earlier in the day I had heard my son say to his mother, "Mama" I want to love Jesus." He didn't know how to express that love, but he did associate loving Jesus with walking down the aisle and talking to the preacher.

I thought to myself, I corrected him for doing the one thing I want him to do more than anything. If I can't understand the needs of my own son, how can I begin to understand the needs of other learning-disabled people?

That day I promised God I would find ways to minister to the needs of these special people. I made it a point to talk to the parents of the learning disabled in our congregation and was amazed at what I found.

"We don't come to church very often," one mother said, "because we can't always keep our son quiet. We know he disturbs those around him."'

"We feel our son is a burden to his Sunday school teacher," another parent said. "He can't keep up with other kids his age, so we just keep him at home."'

When I shared with our leaders what I was hearing, they asked, "What can we do?"

SPECIAL ASSISTANCE

The first thing we did was recruit volunteers to serve as assistants in classes for one month, simply befriending and paying attention to the learning-disabled children. At the end of one month, almost all agreed to continue working.

Our volunteers sat with the children as the leader taught a lesson or led a group activity. They gave individual assistance to anyone who needed help. They assisted in maintaining order, usually by simply sitting beside a disruptive child or briefly separating a child from his classmates, occasionally by taking a child to a parent.

We learned that some of our best workers are older adults who can serve as adoptive grandparents for learning-disabled children. As a reward, the adoptive grandparents invite the children to sit with them during worship or give other special attention. One older man takes his "adopted grandchild" sailing. Even children who tend toward behavioral problems will behave to protect their special privilege.

We have also used other children and youth to assist the learning disabled. This benefits those with the disabilities and helps reinforce lessons for the children and youth.

A special education teacher in the public school, who is a member in our church, provides training and resources for each teacher and assistant. We order materials designed specifically for the learning disabled from a Sunday school supplier.

INCLUDING THE PARENTS

One teacher had problems with a child using profanity. She went to the child's parents and asked for suggestions on how to handle the situation. "My son doesn't understand the difference between negative and positive attention," the mother explained. "We have found that the best way to deal with such behavior is to remove him from direct contact with others for a short period of time."

The next Sunday the teacher sat down with the child before class and told him, "If you misbehave today or talk dirty, I'm going to set you at a table by yourself." The child did repeat his behavior later in the class. The teacher separated him from the others, and after that day she never had a major problem with him.

Since this experience, we have asked each teacher to meet with the parents of their learning-disabled students at least twice a year. During this meeting teachers ask parents what type of behavior to expect and how to deal with it. The parents also assist in establishing realistic goals for the child.

Parents of a learning-disabled child experience significant stress and frustration. We have organized a support group to help them know that others understand and care. We occasionally invite guest speakers, but normally the parents just talk about their problems and the solutions they've found. Each session includes a Bible study.

PUTTING THEM TO WORK

Like anyone else in the church, the learning disabled need something to do. We employ adults with learning disabilities whenever possible, and we look for ministries within the church where they can be active. Some have joined the choir. Others work at registration tables during special meetings and as greeters. Still others help with routine things like setting up tables and chairs or cleaning up after meetings. My own son often goes with me to visit shut-ins.

Many learning-disabled people have had few successes in life and as a result have low self-esteem. Realizing this, we Iooked for things our children could participate in that would give them success.

Many learning-disabled people have good memories. We involved several in our Wednesday evening Scripture memory program. One parent, whose child was involved in this program, took her son to see a psychologist. After a couple of weeks, he asked her, "What does this child do on Wednesday evenings? This seems to be the only positive time in his life."

REACHING OUT

The time came when we decided we wanted to minister to learning-disabled children outside the church. In cooperation with the local school, we began a tutoring program for those with mild disabilities. Our tutors meet one hour each week with children referred by their teachers

The school doesn't permit any Christian content to the tutoring. Last year, of the sixteen children involved in tutoring, none had any connection with a church, but during their time in the program, eleven attended church events. One of them asked Jesus to be her Savior and began bringing her family to church. One of our elders has adopted another as his special project, and the child's parents are becoming receptive to the church.

Through this program we have discovered more needs than we can ever meet. The school principal recently told our tutoring coordinator, "I will send you as many students as you can provide workers."

The program has indirectly given us opportunities to minister to family members. Two young girls in tutoring had older sisters involved in rival gangs. One Wednesday when the older sisters met while dropping off their sisters in our parking lot, they exchanged threats. The next Wednesday one of the older sisters did not return, but the other came with the rest of her gang looking for a fight. Someone from our church invited the gang members in for refreshments, and one of our leaders shared the gospel with them. The gang never met on our parking lot again, but some of them did return for youth activities.

We have put a lot of time and effort into making our church a place where the learning disabled will feel at home. I think my son and others like him who "want to love Jesus"' will find it a much easier place to give and receive his love. And we're finding that learning-disabled persons have a lot of love to give.