This article and “Why I’ve Stayed” form a pair, presenting two distinct approaches to the question: When is it time for me to leave my church? Here, church consultant and former pastor Gary McIntosh outlines some practical, technical considerations. Next, a Texas pastor who has served the same church for fifteen years shares his considerations in staying.
A phone call I received last week left me a little numb. For eleven years a close friend had enjoyed an effective pastoral ministry before taking a more challenging, growing church in Colorado. He called to say he had just resigned after barely a year at the new church.
As we talked I remembered times I had wrestled with the decision to leave a church. Opportunities that had seemed so promising when they began, matches so perfect . . .
Deciding to leave is often, if not always, filled with lingering doubts, self-criticisms, and the pain of unfulfilled dreams. I reminded myself that pastors leave churches all the time. Despite recent studies detailing the benefits of longer pastorates, long tenures are the exception, not the rule.
Parishioners even expect their pastors to leave, sometimes in the best of situations. An effective Methodist pastor in New Jersey, who has seen his church grow considerably in eight years, confided that “the people think it is time I leave.” Curious, isn’t it? Members can be so conditioned to pastors leaving that they expect their pastor to leave even in the midst of a successful ministry.
During my seminary training I heard, “Never take a church unless you can envision yourself staying there the rest of your life.”
That sounded good to me. I admired pastors with records of long tenure. My own pastor had stayed nineteen years. Secretly I looked down on pastors who jumped from church to church like rabbits from one clump of grass to another. I couldn’t see why pastors should be different from physicians, say, or dentists, who establish and build a practice over dozens of years. These professionals have no intention of moving every forty-eight months. Why should we?
My snobbish attitude about short pastorates quickly evaporated following graduation. First, I was not offered any church where I wanted to spend the rest of my life. Second, my initial pastorate ended exactly one year after it began. (Of course it was over “doctrinal” disagreements, which made it OK.)
The simple fact remains that pastors do move and will continue to move.
Practical Questions
Since pastors do face the decision to move many times during their lives, they can use strategic questions to help weigh the decision. Here are some I have found helpful.
1. Have I been here long enough to reach my most effective years? Under the leadership of its founding pastor, Grace Baptist Church grew rapidly from sixteen charter members in 1954 to ninety-four just four years later. Then the pastor resigned. In the following four years there was a succession of three pastors: One stayed eight months, another a year, and the third stayed two years. This rapid turnover was instrumental in stalling the church’s growth and creating a nineteen-year plateau.
Our research at the Institute for American Church Growth has found that the average tenure for pastors in the largest churches is twenty-one years.
The question immediately arises, “Are these churches growing because their pastors stayed a long time?” or “Did these pastors stay because their churches were growing?” The answer is probably some of both. But studies conducted among Lutherans, Methodists, and Presbyterians confirm that long pastorates are more effective in attracting and holding members.
Our studies have found a pastor’s most effective years begin in the sixth or seventh year in a church. The fact that so many pastors leave after three or four years is a major reason 80 percent of American churches are on a plateau or in decline.
The question must be asked, “Have I stayed long enough to reach my most effective years of ministry in this church?” A number of factors affect the answer to this question, but the six- to seven-year rule of thumb should be taken seriously.
2. Do I have a dream for this church? While reading an airline magazine last week, the title of a lead article caught my attention: “I Didn’t Do This for the Money . . . I Did This To Make a Dream Happen.” That should be the theme of every pastor.
Robert Schuller says the pastor ought to be hired to “dream dreams and then to plan and execute them.” Robert Dale writes in To Dream Again, “Behind every great achievement is a dreamer of great dreams. Much more than a dreamer is required to bring it to reality; but the dream must be there first.”
As you sit in your study or car contemplating a move, ask yourself, “Do I have a dream for my church? Have I shared it with anyone? Have I helped my church redefine its dream in the last three years?”
Healthy churches have a dream of what God wants to do through them. And the pastor is the chief dreamer. These pastors continually ask God to help them see his dream for their churches. If God does not spark you with his dreams for this church, it is unlikely that your church will grow or that you are the one to lead it. On the other hand, if you do have a clear vision for the future of your church, perhaps you should stay to see it become a reality.
3. Do my spiritual gifts match the present needs of my position and church? A pastor in Portland, Oregon, planted a church by sheer energy and love. He realized his gifts were primarily in the areas of pastoral care and counseling. Over a period of twelve years, his church slowly grew. Struggles came, people came and left, but always there was that supportive group gathered around him because of his gifts.
As his church grew to almost two hundred members, he began to be distressed at the impossibility of leading this group and still being each member’s pastor. The church hired a part-time assistant who assumed much of the administration, thus freeing him to exercise his pastoral gift. Things went well until the assistant left for another church. A few months later, the senior pastor resigned.
The moral of this true story is that not every pastor has the gifts to lead a church through its many growth stages. While this pastor had excellent gifts in pastoral care, counseling, and one-to-one contact, he was not gifted to lead the church above the two-hundred barrier. It may have been better for him to recognize his gifts and either move to a smaller church where they could be fully exercised or start a new church whenever his congregation approached the two-hundred mark.
What are your gifts? Do they match the needs of your church, both now and in the near future? If we take spiritual gifts seriously, these questions must be answered. If your gifts match your position, it may not be time to leave.
4. Is my philosophy of ministry compatible with my church? A pastor was called to a church in California where it quickly became evident there were two factions, each with a different philosophy of ministry. One group was basically nurture-oriented; these people expected the pastor to visit every member at least once or twice a year. Shepherding the flock was the pastor’s sole responsibility.
The other group was committed to a large, evangelistically oriented ministry. These people were deeply involved in outreach ministries, and they wanted the pastor’s main emphasis to be visiting prospective members. If the pastor visited you, a member, you were either in deep trouble or deathly ill.
The church was a disaster waiting to happen. The pastor confided to me that he felt as though horses were tied to each arm and were pulling in opposite directions.
Every pastor and every church has a philosophy of ministry, though it may not be explicitly defined or clearly articulated. When thinking of leaving a church, ask yourself, “Does my philosophy of ministry match that of my church?” If so, perhaps you should stay. If not, it may be an indication it is time for a change.
5. Does my social and cultural background fit this church? A denominational executive recently told me of a pastor who had served a church in Wyoming for several years. He enjoyed wearing Levis during the week and often wore his cowboy boots on Sunday. He accepted a call to a church in Seattle where three-piece pinstripe suits were the norm. Two years later he was back in the Mountain states in another church.
It has always amazed me that churches and pastors do not consider social and cultural backgrounds when making a change. Churches call pastors from east to west and south to north. While these long-distance calls often connect, I have seen different cultural expectations, customs, language, and practices become major reasons pastors leave churches.
Consider your church: Are its cultural patterns and expectations quite different from yours? If the friction constantly produces sparks or if adaptation demands a major portion of your energy, it may be an indication change is needed.
6. Considering the opportunities facing the church, am I the right person to lead it? A medium-sized church in Missouri had experienced modest growth over a seven-year period. The church began to realize it would need new facilities if this growth were to continue: more parking, more educational and worship space. An architect was hired, plans were developed, and a special fund was established to begin the building program.
The pastor began to realize he did not have the ability to lead the church in this project. After several months he decided to leave in order to allow the church to move ahead in the building program. A new pastor was called with building-program experience and the church took hold of this opportunity for growth.
Most churches face great opportunities for ministry, perhaps launching a building program, developing a school, or planting a new church. Are you able to provide the leadership necessary? If so, it may be wise to stay.
7. Do I have a specialized ministry my church needs? Today more pastors are taking a specialist role as opposed to the generalist role pastors filled in the first half of this century. The change may be likened to the increasing number of specialists in the medical field.
Some pastors, for example, are excellent church planters. One pastor in the Northwest plants a church, leads it for two to three years, and then leaves to start another one. Over the years he has planted ten churches, all of which are thriving today. His is a specialist role. The time he stayed in each church varied according to the particular need, yet he realized his role was to start the church, not to pastor it for twenty years. He wisely understood that when his specialized role was no longer needed in one setting, it was time to move to another.
Other pastors are specialists in less-recognized areas. Take the “healer,” a pastor who has the gift of coming to a church with many hurts and over time bringing healing. Or the “peacemaker,” the pastor able to enter a war-torn congregation and bring about a peaceful solution. Another specialized role is the “builder.” I know one pastor who has always gravitated to churches that need someone to help them build new facilities. He has built a church building in every pastorate of his thirty-five years of ministry.
Many specialized ministries are effective for short periods of time. If the pastor stays longer than needed to accomplish the unique ministry, the church will feel stymied by a lack of leadership in other important areas. If you are in a specialized ministry, be sensitive to the timing when your skills are needed.
8. Is my credibility strong enough that people are willing to follow me? Credibility is like money in the bank. You can write checks on it as long as there are sufficient funds to back it up.
How is credibility deposited? Primarily through a ministry of love to people in the church. It takes several years in an established church before much credibility is credited to a pastor’s account. I readily recall the time when the people in one of my churches began to refer to me as “our” pastor rather than “the” pastor. It was right after I performed the funeral of one of the key people in the church.
Credibility can also be squandered or lost. Pastors who spend much time in activities outside the church may begin to see credibility trickle away. A breakdown in morality robs the account. So does staying beyond an age when you can minister effectively.
Or credibility might be lost through poor decisions. One pastor led his church into a fund-raising program with an outside firm. The firm ran off with close to $200,000. While the loss was not strictly the pastor’s fault, he had recommended employing the firm. Following the incident people stopped accepting his leadership in other areas.
Credibility can be built up again, however, and most pastors who stay and continue the daily tasks of ministry will find theirs increasing. In some instances, though, pastors may be wise to recognize that their credibility is nearly bankrupt, and consider a fresh start.
9. Given my current situation, am I willing to pay the price of pastoral ministry? Jokes abound among pastors about how their churches want them to do everything from preaching and visiting new members to walking on water and raising the dead. Role models from years past show a pastor working long hours, neglecting family for the church, and standing ready to preach, marry, or bury at a moment’s notice.
Many pastors do work hard and are under a great deal of stress. One of the reasons for this is simply that pastoral ministry includes, among other things, receiving new training, taking some risks, and working hard.
In some situations, however, interpersonal conflicts and related problems can mount to the point where pastors are no longer willing to expend the energy required of them. The weight feels overwhelming. Or, more often, they’re willing to work hard, but find their efforts thwarted at practically every turn.
Are you able and willing to shoulder the workload of the pastorate in your current situation? If so, then you have one of the characteristics necessary to stay and minister effectively.
10. Is my leadership style what the church needs at this time? Pastors display various styles of leadership. Some are quite decisive, even dictatorial. Others are easygoing and prefer to roll with the punches. They rarely make tough decisions. Still others are a blend of the two. They like to delegate some decisions while making others themselves.
Matching the pastor’s style of leadership with the needs of the church is tricky. The church’s size is one critical element here. A new church of under one hundred often needs a pastor with a loving style of leadership, one who calls on everyone and is always available. But as the church grows to over two hundred, it comes to require a pastor who leads by direction. The pastor becomes more of a foreman overseeing the laity in their various roles. Still larger churches require a pastor who leads by delegation, who is more like the chairman of the board in a large corporation.
Most pastors can adjust their style of leadership. Few can drastically change it. This fact is one major reason for the large number of churches plateaued between 200 and 250 members. It is precisely at this point that a change in leadership style is required for the church to experience additional growth.
Does your leadership style mesh with the size and needs of your congregation? If it does, then it may be another indicator you’re in the right place.
Below is a short quiz to help you sort your thinking about these questions. The quiz can’t make the decision for you, but may help clarify your situation.
Answer each question as honestly as possible with a yes or no. (Caution: Taking this test on Monday mornings or the day after a church business meeting can skew the results. Take it at a time when you can be as clear-headed and generous in your thinking as possible. )
IS IT TIME TO LEAVE?
1. I have been at my church less than seven years.
2. I have a dream for my church.
3. I sense that my spiritual gifts match the present needs of my position ad will for several years to come.
4. My philosophy of ministry is compatible with my church’s; we work together smoothly.
5. My socio-cultural background fits my church’s, or at least we’ve come to a good understanding on expectations, practices, and traditions.
6. My church is facing opportunities for ministry, and I am able to help it take advantage of these.
7. If I am a generalist, that’s the role my church needs. If I am a specialist, my church has a need for my specialty in the coming years.
8. I have credibility and my people are willing to follow my leadership in major decisions.
9. I am willing and able to work hard with my church.
10. My leadership style generally fits my church’s needs.
Scoring: Count the number of yeses. If your number was
9-10: Unpack your bags. You definitely need to stay.
7-8: Stay in your own yard. Don’t look to greener pastures.
5-6: Unclear. Work to improve areas represented by the statements answered no.
3-4: Prepare your resume. It is likely time to move on.
1-2: You should have sent out your resume yesterday.
Prayerful Consideration
A pastor in northern California looked at these questions and honestly answered no to almost all of them. By all practical, common-sense standards, he should have left. And he almost did, but he had a strong sense that God wanted him to stay. He stayed and today his church is thriving, a near legend in his community. All of his no answers have since turned to yes, and the church has grown significantly.
The quiet leading of the Holy Spirit is certainly not to be neglected. God delights to work his miracles in difficult situations. There are plenty of examples of churches around the country where he is doing that.
At the same time, many pastors refuse to acknowledge logical, common-sense indications that it may be time to leave. This refusal can lead to stressful situations that keep God from using the church fully in ministry.
Deciding to leave is never easy, and once the decision is made, the process of relocating may be difficult. But an honest appraisal of these indicators can allow God to use you in the place and time that will ultimately bring greatest benefit to his kingdoms
Gary L. McIntosh is vice-president of The Institute for American Church Growth, Pasadena, California.
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