I was planning Eleanor’s funeral when I realized how long I had been part of the life of her family. I had buried Eleanor’s husband, performed the marriages of her two granddaughters, and baptized her only great-grandchild. Now after eleven years here, I was working with her daughter on her funeral. I have become a fixture to Eleanor’s family. I feel myself becoming a fixture to other families as well.
Long tenures in parish ministry are puzzling. As we watch others who stay on and on, we cannot help but wonder if something has gone amiss in their career. Long-tenured incumbents seem abnormal in a culture accustomed to three-year shifts and upward mobility.
Starting a new ministry has challenges, but so does staying year after year. Here are some of the struggles unique to long-term pastors.
A Special Call and the Long Haul
When pastors first arrive, there is always some issue they feel especially pressed to resolve. Sometimes the issue is falling membership and attendance; sometimes there are splits within the church family over worship forms or social involvement. In my case the call was to rebuild a church that had been severely flooded.
When the rebuilding project was complete, I began to feel I had met the terms of my call and that now I might enjoy the fruits of my labor. Of course, a new “call” was then extended: to help the church finance its rebuilding effort and then rediscover its mission after this preoccupation with bricks and mortar. Later the call became to manage a growing lay ministry as financial pressures changed the old pattern of paid ministry. Just when this call seemed to have been fulfilled, we had a fire and were once again plunged into the call of bricks and mortar.
During each of these waves, I found myself absorbed with the good or bad news of the moment. When attendance shows the slightest sign of increasing, I award myself an honorary degree; when it falls, I consider a vocation as a clam digger.
To survive the long pastorate, it is essential to take the long view of one’s call and learn to feel at home with the changes of agendas, able to handle both success and failure. Although there may be peaks of good times, and valleys of bad, long-tenured pastors must learn to maintain energy and focus through them all.
Operating Out of Habit
In the first years of a pastorate, most of us work hard to rethink every detail of ministry, trying to balance our insights against the tradition of our congregation. We try to make our special mark. But as time passes, it becomes tempting to coast on the work of earlier years. A special service we planned last year for Palm Sunday we may now simply recycle with a new choir anthem and date.
It’s also tempting to coast on pastoral investments of the early years. By now we know the parish, and we know that our investment in certain individuals has not paid off. Therefore, as we consider pastoral work, we will easily skip over this person or discharge our obligation with a phone call or letter.
When habit patterns take control, personal growth and growth in our people is strangled. We must continually see ourselves and our members as growing and changing. The person who failed us during last year’s round of calls may have found new life this year and should receive our attention. The service that was wonderful last year may be inappropriate this year.
The solution to habit patterns controlling us is to allow new influences to affect our lives. Shifts in staff, or lay assistance, are key to this process. Finding others who can share discipline with us in a structured setting will also help. Continuing education is crucial to the challenging of old habit patterns.
Aging Well, But Not Too Well
Moving from being “the new kid on the block,” which we all once were, to being the old man on the block (which I am rapidly becoming!) is painful. While we were the new kids, others were able to comfort us and guide us through the local mazes. But as each pastor our senior moves to greener pastures or into retirement, a sense of loss attacks our spirits, and we wonder who our friends now are. Also, being the new kid allowed us certain privileges-to challenge and be outspoken, which is good. But as we become elder statesmen, our efforts at making new companions may wane, as may our willingness to challenge the status quo. But the need for counsel and friendship will continue and even grow the longer we stay.
The solution is to maintain a visible woundedness that allows others, potential healers, to draw close to us. Having our lives too successfully packaged is a sure repellent for potential friends who might make this year and the next more manageable for us.
Learning to Let Go
Long-term pastorates inevitably lead us into many community and denominational activities. After a time in office, we eventually rotate off, and where we may once have exerted influence and leadership, we are suddenly uninvolved. I always feel an initial sense of loss, and I have wondered if I am being put out to pasture. I also secretly hope that the activity in question will founder without my brilliant skill at the tiller!
But this never seems to happen, and over time I find that new opportunities arise in both community and denomination which draw me into new areas of leadership and personal growth. However, the need to let go of past efforts is essential if these new opportunities are then to be opened up.
Twelve Easter Sermons
After twelve Easter Day sermons, you begin to wonder if any juice is left. The barrel of old stories is by now empty. This same emptiness sets in when you encounter the twelfth stewardship campaign or the twelfth Lenten series. The new ideas you brought into the position are threadbare.
Is there anything I haven’t told them by now? you wonder as you ponder the almost too familiar gospel stories.
As I began this tenure, I felt if I did my very best work at the start, everything would be fine in the long haul. Actually, at the start people were so busy getting used to me that they only barely listened. Later on it became more important to do excellent work. If we really believe the gospel is new every morning and rich in new insights, we need to experience this personally to present it with conviction.
There is no surer way to accomplish this, I have found, than to share closely with others the details of my own personal pilgrimage, details that are surely changing from day to week to month to year. Parishioners are experiencing their own pilgrimages also, which can then build upon ours. It is the willingness to share all this that makes the long tenure a rich and growing experience for both incumbent and parishioners.
Short visits anywhere are like an overnight stay in a foreign city: they emphasize appearances and flash. Long visits anywhere, whether to churches or in marital relationships, call us to probe the depths of our souls, where Christians believe Christ is uniquely present.
-Stewart Pierson
Saint Stephen’s Episcopal Church
Wilkes-Barre, Pennsylvania
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